Saturday, December 03, 2005

100 Things to Know about Women

A couple of my male coworkers included me on a little email discussion and wanted to know how many of these I agree with. I'd have to say a lot are right on. The ones that I'm particulary enthusiastic about:

99. Most women will not have sex for the first time with a guy unless their legs are shaved. If your date shows up and you spot stubble, she’s trying to keep herself in line.
91. She still has all the love letters and cards from her past boyfriends.
88. If I give you my number on Friday, Tuesday and Wednesday are your best bets to score a date. Monday is too desperate, Thursday is too late.
67. Kiss her before two dates have gone by or you’ll be “friended.”
64. An online dating service’s survey found that a woman’s ideal man has brown hair and blue eyes.
36. At one point or another, I’ve gone through your things looking for any evidence from past relationships. I’m talking photographs, postcards, mementos, address books, diaries. If you don’t like it, get rid of this stuff before letting me in your apartment. It’s not about trust; it’s about curiosity, and it drives us crazy till it’s been satiated.
31. Got a new girl coming over? Your (tidy) bathroom should include clean linen, a box of Puffs Plus, and several full rolls of TP.
30. Don’t caress our faces while we’re kissing, unless you really, really, really like us.
6. Rub a sheet of medium-grade sandpaper across your face. That’s your five o’clock shadow when you kiss her.

1 comment:

The Equalizer said...

I am enlightened....

Last November, with a Little Trip to Austin

Stuff from last November! At work we made little bandanas for pets in shelters. I guess when they have a colorful thing around their neck ...